Parenting

Raising children with values to make them good human beings.

These words have proved magical in Parenting.

Do you recognize the importance to build up your children every day with positive enforcement ?

These Words of Love and Affirmation is what Every Child Wants to Hear .

Carefully chosen words will encourage your child’s positive actions.

These Daily Affirmations are fantastic tools to build confidence in your child and encourage positive behavior.

Using this technique over time, your child will start to realize the value of their positive qualities and actions and associate that with who they are as a person.

Powerful Affirmations to Say to Your Children :

  • I love to hear your voice.
  • I will always believe in you.
  • I can’t imagine my life without you.
  • You make others smile.
  • You have so much kindness in your heart.
  • You are the light of my life.
  • You are a wonderful listener.
  • You encourage me to keep learning new things along with you.
  • You are truly amazing.
  • You have a unique imagination that allows you to see things others cannot.
  • You care for others deeply.
  • You make my heart so happy when you…( fill in action )
  • You handled that situation very bravely.
  • You are and always will be beautiful/handsome.
  • I love how generous you are to others, even when it is difficult.
  • I will always be there for you.
  • You can do great things.
  • Always do what is right, no matter the consequences.
  • Your hugs make my heart happy.
  • I love you to the moon and back.
  • We are God’s precious gift to us.
  • I am proud of who you are.
  • I am very proud to call you my child.
  • I love you !

Do you have some of your own positive affirmations that you tell your children?
We at Parenting.in would love to hear from you !

We as normal human beings moving around and living in our towns and cities must have surely seen some shocking instances of child abuse by their own parents.

This harsh parenting is highly prevalent not only in the slums and roadside shanties but also in middle class households and also in high society families. It is a domestic evil which needs to be eradicated totally in order to build a new healthy India,  new healthy citizens of tomorrow.

What causes this harsh parenting ? One of the reasons is poverty. Low income and frustrations in life causes utmost stress in parents which they vent upon  their children physically , mentally causing irreparable harm as children do remember such harsh  instances which get imbibed into their minds causing them to start disliking the parent and in the later stage of life they mistreat their parent who now is old and dependent on the child.

 

Authoritarian parenting is also another kind of harsh parenting. Authoritarian parents try to manipulate and control the minds of their children. Their expectations from their children are very high in terms of academic performances and also obedience to what they say. They lay strict day to day behavioral rules and expect their obedience. Such authoritarian parents also shame their child and make them feel guilty on slightest digression of the rules laid. They follow the policy “ No questions”.

Children raised by authoritarian parents are likely to obey but only out of fear and not sincerely. This type of long term parenting  creates a dislike for the concerned parent. Also the child effected by strict parenting  is likely to become like them in their behavior socially, be amongst their friends and school mates.

The child reciprocates in the same way towards their companions as their strict parent. If parent keeps on yelling, he yells too… shaming him, he shames others, being bullied.. he bullies too.

Children raised of authoritarian parenting  find it difficult to relate themselves with their friends and mates as they become aggressive in nature and are likely to pick up quarrels and confrontations.

Authoritarian parents also think various ways of punishing their children mentally, emotionally, financially and in most shocking way physically too.

All this tend to poor performance of the child academically, also leading to depression anxiety and low self esteem which may have long term negative effects.

Authoritarian parenting also causes submissiveness, timidity and fearfulness in the children. They feel they have to be blindly obedient to the orders given without using intellect & logic and they do this out of fear for being punished resulting into losing confidence and courage in dealing with unforeseen situations.

One instance of what a strict father use to do with his son

This son was 8 years old.

This father was a very strict man. He would never allow his son to be alone with his mother. He used to beat his son constantly. Can you imagine how he used to punish his son? Its shocking ! He used to burn all his things. His toys, his clothes other valuables. One day he took his son to a Basket Ball match and and also bought  him a ball and also a jersey T Shirt. Next day his son left something on the floor in his room for which he was beaten and as an extended  punishment  he burnt the ball and his jersey T shirt in a fit of rage. The son felt and it never made sense to him as to how he can burn such expensive things which he had bought for him only a few hours ago. And when he narrated this to his friends they use to often laugh and joke about it.

One instance of constant cross examination and grilling

One such child narrates about her mother’s complex and authoritarian personality of constant grilling and cross examining every single day for every single issue.

Living with such a suspicious and insane mother was a worst kind of torture which she had to undergo as slightest omissions in replies was unacceptable and unpardonable.  Where were you till now ? Why did you go there? Why are you late ? Whom did you go to meet? Why you wanted to meet ? What did you do there? She use to try to corner her daughter and confuse her into replies and try to make her lie and flare into rage scowling screaming yelling  with total domination. The daughter on her way back home had to had to think of the answers which she would have to give in the grilling and cross examination on reaching home which would make her all the more tense and fearful.

Few things which can be avoided in parenting 

  • Do not compare the siblings. This comparison is very common. This may cause a rift amongst the siblings and can create negative feelings for parent.
  • There may be some times of frustration in discharging your responsibilities and the child may not be aware of the same. Outburst of anger may cause a feeling of neglect especially in very young children. One needs to practice patience in such times.
  • Do not ever shame your child for anything bad he may have done. One may adopt better and positive ways of explaining the kids the difference between good and bad.
  • Do not accuse and criticize for any wrong decision which he must have taken as they may not be meeting your expectation which may be a field of study or a job. Constructive and matured discussion can solve these types of issues.
  • Do not tell him and compare him to yourself as to how better and capable you were when you were his age. This is the result of high expectation you have as you desire to raise a perfect child. Instead one should recollect one ‘s own short comings as a child and try to address the same does not happen to your child. This has to be done in a discreet way.
  • Do not accuse the child that he is trying to hurt you. The child must have done anything un-intentionally and by accusing him you may create a feeling of guilt inside him.

Author : RajKumar Sachdev

Do you remember when you monitored your infants’ routine and inculcated a discipline? Did you notice how the little one got used to the timeline? This is how the infant adapts to time- sequence and it got wired in their brain.

Often as the child enters the preteen years, children want to wean off from timelines and there stems a conflict in parenting and rearing. This is also a phase where children are learning to make their own planning and time table. It is a choice they want to make and they wish to feel empowered. For a parent, this is an overwhelming phase and it is not easy to ‘Let go’.

You may find a child organized in a few areas and not in others. Challenging them or scolding them for a few goof-ups will not work. In fact, it will demotivate them to an extent that they may give up on the chores they were good at. This is a delicate phase and a prelude to the teen years and young adulthood.

Ten smooth sailing tips to help your child plan and respect time.

1.  Give them a freehand to make a timeline. Yes, in writing.

2. Agree to a few, let them learn as they try out. It is okay if they do not succeed.

3. For most kids it may sound exciting but when they are not able to meet their targets, they feel dejected. It is  of utmost importance to be with your child and accept their failings as a guide and mentor.

4. Avoid dictating a time table for them though this is a short cut method and saves time. Let them chalk up in  a neat paper and show it to you.

5. A gentle tweaking of their time and making allowances on a holiday or week day works well.

6. Encourage them when they are moody.

7. Explain them to stave off the mobile and social network. Take a walk or play with them instead.

8. Praise and reward them for all accomplishments

9. Explain to them that the most successful people manage their time well. Explaining that Time is money is not good idiom for kids. Time is IMPORTANT is a wonderful way to say it.

10.Love them for what they ARE.

 

Author : Kamakshi Gupte – Counselling Psychologist
www.thecoolparentingguide.com

Kids photo created by freepik – www.freepik.com

As a parent, we literally bringing another living, breathing, human being into the world- for the next 18 years or so.
it is our responsibility to teach our child to navigate the ups and downs of life, and the society he or she is being brought into by having a strong foundation.

Here are the life lessons to teach children :

– Good manners.
Say “Please”, ” Sorry” and “Thank you” when you are interacting with your child. Children learn best by example.

– Treat everyone with equal respect.
Every soul is precious and It does not matter what they look like, or what they do believe in, or what is their caste or status – offer unconditional love to them.

– Forgive and love with all their hearts
By showering our children with love, we can teach them to love unconditionally with all their hearts. Children will pick up important values such as empathy & respecting other people’s choices.

– Be helpful
Encourage children to offer a helping hand whenever possible. This teaches them kindness, compassion, and empathy.

– Always keep asking questions.
Life is a school and teaches us. The moment we stop learning is the moment we stop growing.

– Don’t be afraid of making mistakes.
We are human and nobody is perfect. It’s learning from mistakes that makes us grow.

– Value of honesty.
Explain to your child that he/she should always aim to tell the truth & how it helps.

– Work hard but accept be human
Grades are important, but…Being a good human being is more important.

– It’s okay to be wrong.
If we convince ourselves that we already know everything, we will never learn and grow. Keep the ego aside.

– Healthy food choices
Children adopt healthy eating habits from what they have been practicing from young. Despite your busy daily schedule,  prepare healthy meals for the family.

– Live with Happiness and Positivity
The ups and downs of life are always there. Encourage children to focus on the positives, and thank God for their blessings. There is always so much to be thankful for.

Children love to play and so does everyone. It’s a known fact the world over and it hails from centuries.

Why do you think children love to play?

There are many reasons children love to play, for instance:

– They enjoy playing very much.

– They love to create very much.

– They love to be called a “champion”, a “winner” who takes pride in winning.

– It helps them be with their friends.

– It makes them forget their worries and love themselves better.

Thus, children have a specific philosophy of life when they are especially small and adolescent. This specific philosophy is of making their life their playground where they can rejoice their victories and live life enjoyingly.

Now, you might think that your child is dumb just because he/she loves to play a lot, right?

If you as a parent are thinking like that, then you’re thinking something wrong. The children who love to play are the ones who really love life to its optimum. After all, life is a playground where you enjoyingly play games.

Here’s what playing games and outdoor sports can benefit your child:

  • Build Stamina, Health and Flexibilty.

  • Build Leadership Skills and Team Spirit.

  • Build Creative and Communication Skills.

  • Help Them Learn Sportsmanship.

  • Help Build Strength and Toughness.

Your child requires to explore the outer world that is beyond their books and feel the experience that life generates. Your child has to open up in his/her beautiful way and build upon his/her own self-confidence. If you will restrict your child within the “shell” of books and text books, your child will never be able to explore the talent that is within him/her self. After all, do you remember who said that phrase…

“All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy!”Â

As it is said, “Every Child Is Special!” Playing games make them feel more special.

Happenings @ Hansel & Gretel

 

Here are activities and workshops which will be conducted

Story Telling Session by Jeeva Raghunath

Enjoy an evening of fun and storytelling for kids by Jeeva Raghunath on Friday, March 6, 2009 at 6 p.m.

 

activities and workshops

Craft Corner – Beginners Embroidery

Introduce your child to embroidery through a beginners class on basic stitches and designs.

7 years & above.  Saturdays, 10:30 a.m.—12:30 p.m.

 

Fun with Maths – Introduction to Division

Help your children learn division using practical examples. Brain tickling quizzes and worksheets will be used for assessment every week.   7 yrs—12 yrs.

Saturdays. 2 p.m.—4p.m.

 

Baby Bounce & RhymeTime

Filled with sessions that include action songs, story time, nursery rhymes and simple games, this program focuses on all-round development in young children.  Age:  1 – 2 ½ yrs.
Weekday & Weekend Batches.

Timings: 10:30 a.m. – 12:30 p.m.

 

Effective English Series

Reading Workshop:

Enrich your child’s English language skills through reading practice with focus on fluency, pronunciation, expression, posture and eye contact.   Sundays.  3 p.m—5 p.m.  7 yrs—9 yrs

 

Creative Writing Workshop:

Unleash your child’s creative writing potential…This workshop will help young writers build their confidence, develop their creativity, improve their ability to build a cohesive story and have a lot of fun in the process!  Sundays.  1 p.m.—3 p.m.  9 yrs—12 yrs.

 

Summer Fun 2009

Public Speaking, English Enrichment, Story Time, Arts & Crafts, Drawing & Painting, Outdoor / Indoor games, Puzzles, Music and much more…

Rolling enrolment.

Apr 1 — Jun 12 2009

Half Day & Full Day Programs.

Read, Rhyme & Sing-Along
Develop your child’s language skills through interactive stories, traditional rhymes, finger-plays, sing-along songs and book reading sessions. The focus is on developing their language fluency, honing their listening skills, increasing their attention span, boosting their self-confidence and building their interest in reading.
Saturdays.  10:30 a.m.— 12 p.m. Age: 3 yrs—6 yrs
Chennai: Please contact 044 – 2815 2549 for more details.
Hansel & Gretel
11 Jagadambal Street
T.Nagar, Chennai 600 017
Ph: 28152549

As you know, every child has to grow someday but the parent still visualizes their child as their sweet little kid in their hearts. As children start maturing, they develop a change mechanism within themselves which keeps them dynamic in their behavior all the time. As they start realizing their adulthood, their way of perceiving events, people and situations drastically change. It is not a good deal for parents to always communicate with their adult children in the same way they used to speak when their children were smallParenting Adult Children With An Open MindAs a parent, you might find a lot of “roughness” within your adult child. He/she might not be matured enough to realize the fact that they have to learn to deal with their life in its most “natural” manner. Many children even after becoming adults aren’t successful in dealing with their own lives by themselves. They require their own identity, individuality and understanding to develop themselves and would not like parents interfering with their lifestyle.

Though a parent always speaks with unconditional love truly from the bottom of their hearts, a parent must tactfully speak with their adult child to make them understand their view point. Listening to their adult child’s grievances can help a parent maintain a caring relationship with their child. So, Keep an open mind! Be a good parent today! Happy Parenting!

Children often fall in bad company while they are in school or college. It can be dangerous for their future and present life. Thus, there are some necessary steps that have to be taken in order to make sure your child grow up to become respectable individuals. Parenting Children with correct steps helps the children to get on the right track.Parenting Children To Make Sure Of Their Righteous BehaviorCreating awareness about “traps” & “loops” can be a great way to make children become rationally sound and honest individuals of the society. Children require to be made aware of the threats that things like smoking, drugs, alcohol, sexual abuse and abusive behavior holds.

The key here is make them conscientious and introspective in their behavior. This will keep them in check of their own behavior. The aim is to make them perceive and realize the true reality that exists within the world.

Happy Parenting!

Children love to dream and listen to fairy tales. Dreams can be very encouraging and exciting, no wonder! Child enjoy dreaming so much that many even get lost into them. However, you must ensure that your child learns how to handle their dreams very smartly. Make Your Children Smarter and Sharper with the help of following tips. Make Your Children Smarter and SharperHere’s what you must do to ensure they grow smarter and help them achieve their dreams:

You must ensure you keep their enthusiasm getting better and better consistently.

You must ensure that you make your child feel complete with what you do for them and your child does not have any complains for you or anybody else.

Children are required to focus on certain very essential issues that relate to their growth in a big way. They are required to develop skills in many areas and some of them are very crucial to their growth. They are:

Relationships
Academics
Sports
Performance
Spiritual Psyche
Physical, Mental and Physiological
Communication
Positive Thinking
Time Management
Learning and Exploration
Health
Social Service

Most importantly, you must make efforts to enhance their confidence by sharpening their Concentration, Curiosity and Intelligence. doing so will encourage your child to become a transparent human being thus making him/her stronger than ever.

Every parent is concerned about their dearest child and every parent looks after their child’s life very seriously. Thus, every parent keeps talking repeatedly to their child about their misbehavior and this annoys children repeatedly. we should encourage our Children to become better in life in every way. Children take their parents repeated gestures as “unwanted” and as “bickering”. They dislike being told repeatedly by their parents to do things they would not like to. It irritates them to the extent that they stop talking to their parents for a while.Children To Become Better In LifeThis further leads to a communication gap which creates further misunderstandings. It comes to a situation where disrespect grows for each other and there are frequent fights which are unproductive at both ends. This is a disastrous situation for a family. Thus, a parent is mainly responsible for keeping the family intact. So, a parent must take lead to reanalyze the situation and make changes to their own behavior or style of working.

Firstly, Keep cool and calm. Do not exaggerate the situation whatever the case maybe.

Secondly, it is a matter of conviction. What matters is you convince them about your thoughts rather than enforce your thoughts on your child.

Thirdly, clarify with your own self of what you want. You must have a clear idea of what you want.

Fourthly, Look for an appropriate time when you think your child will listen to you utmost and then approach them with a smile.

Fifth, discuss freely but do not browbeat, complain, criticize, condemn or analyze in front of them. It would irritate them a lot. Stick to the point and make them visualize what you mean to say.

Sixth,  Speak the truth and say it genuinely. If you’re genuine in your thoughts, your child cannot evade listening to you et all.

Be A Good Parent Today! Happy Parenting!